Are You Depressed or Are You Lost?

"Depressed" and "depression" are very common words in our daily conversations. Many of us have learned to use them instead of other, more accurate synonyms like sad, melancholic, disappointed, miserable, unhappy, downcast, gloomy, etc. In fact, Merriam-Webster, the famous dictionary, defines "depressed" as feeling unhappiness. No wonder why so many people feel depressed! And from there to feeling sick and incapable to thrive, there's a very little step. Convince yourself of something, and that is what you'll have.

Many self-diagnosed depressions end up becoming true clinical depressions when in reality, they are just life blocks, unsolved situations that make us feel hopeless, lost, tired and sad.

Clinical depressions have to comply with very clear criteria to be real mental disorders. Some people end up complying with those criteria because they find no solution to some dilemmas or situations in their lives. They then lose hope, feel trapped, consume their energy in never-ending loops of despair and worry until that becomes their daily life pattern. It's not really a pathological loss of strength and will but an unavoidable result when time goes by and a solution isn't found.

Many of those people don't need a doctor. They're not truly sick. They need help in finding new interpretations, new perspectives, new understandings that lead them to unexpected solutions to their problems. They need somebody who can help them find new approaches and different avenues. Sometimes, that is easier said than done, I know, because the person's acquired beliefs block them from seeing solutions that are clearly visible to those around them, but that doesn't make them sick! That makes them lost or blind! In those cases, what those people are suffering from is a life block or a lack of vision, not a real depression! In the past, many of those situations were solved with the help of elders and friends. Today, in a growingly isolated society, where people share less and dare not truly communicate, professionals are seeking to offer advice and help. That, again, doesn't make those lost people sick! By labeling them (or themselves) sick, the label becomes a new burden to bear. They convince themselves that their problem is pathological and thus lose even more hope. Little by little, the lack of solutions, the weight of their label and their lack of hope really convince them that they are mentally sick. And so, they gradually become truly sick.

How can we then help ourselves and others to prevent this from happening? Let me give you a few tips:

1. Let's start calling things by their real name! Let's start allowing ourselves the freedom to express what we truly feel, instead of labeling our feelings with the general, ill-chosen and mostly erroneous term: "depressed." Learn to use new terms and expressions and make the effort to be precise and clear.
2. Let's start helping those around us express themselves, too. Whenever a friend of loved one tells you they are depressed, ask them to clarify their feelings to you; ask them to be more precise so they can understand their own feelings better. That often gives them the opportunity to understand what is causing those feelings and sensations, which frequently results in the new perspective they needed to guide them into finding a solution.
3. Ask for help. If you find yourself (or know of somebody in this situation) facing or experiencing a problem you can't solve, don't wait for magical inspiration to offer you an unexpected solution. Look for help. Ask your friends, your loved ones, or even a professional humanologist to help you see new avenues and perspectives. If life is a challenge, act before it becomes unbearable. Help is out there, just waiting for you to ask for it.
   
4. Avoid labels. Trying to fit into a defining box can lead you to not really understanding the problem. We often need to find a name for something in order to give ourselves permission to understand or accept it. But situations and circumstances don't need any labels. They just are. They just happen. And they can be tackled even without a label or name to define them.
5. Love yourself. Yes, I know this might sound a bit foreign here but believe me, loving yourself is one of the most powerful ways to prevent depressions and pseudo-depressions. Loving somebody means caring for them and wanting the best for them. If you love yourself, you'll want the best for yourself and you'll make efforts to care for yourself. You will, therefore, prevent any situation from growing out of control and will look for means, methods and strategies to keep you well, healthy and happy. So look inside yourself for the love all human beings deserve and make sure that it's there. If it's not, ask for help. Others can help you find the way to letting yourself feel worthy and accepting of it.

Clinical depression and feeling lost or stuck are NOT the same thing. Let's join forces in helping ourselves and others avoid mental illness. Life problems, difficult circumstances, losses, disappointments, loneliness, dead ends, lack of physical, emotional or intellectual resources or fear are NOT synonyms for depression but can lead to that unless solved. Don't fall into that trap. Learn to live and be happy.

Enjoy life, ALL of it,

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The One Choice That Changes Everything

There's one principle from unconscious psychology that is beyond powerful. Even if this is the only thing you learn from me, you'll quickly grow happier, wealthier, more productive and healthier.

You can use this to correct minor foibles or completely overhaul your life.

And it works in any domain - whether you're an athlete, business professional or someone looking for love.

Do this and you'll start spotting opportunities. It'll feel like magic, as if the universe is responding to your desires. These chances were always there but, for the first time, you start to pay attention.

It all comes down to a choice that anyone can make at any time.

The simplest and most powerful decision:

What do you choose to focus on right now?

Because in unconscious psychology, the Law of Attention says that whatever you focus on is what you get more of.

Pay attention to the good things and you get more of them. Focus on the bad and... well, you can get more of that, too.

This isn't some empty philosophy telling you to "think positive!"

It's solid psychology telling you to pay attention, right now, to what's working.

There are people who choose to focus on the negative. They criticise everything and everyone. An hour in their presence can make you want to punch something. They poke holes in every idea and explain how every achievement is really a failure.

And the strange thing is that these people are miserable.

Shouldn't they be happy? After all, in their minds, everything around them is broken. This makes them the lone hero, the voice of reason.

It makes them better than everyone else.

But no, they are bitter and miserable.

That's because they actively seek out (or create) negativity, so they wind up with more of it.

They focus on the bad stuff, so more bad stuff happens.

Don't be this person.

Then there are the genuinely joyful.

They see beauty and opportunity everywhere.

I'm not talking about being naïve or overly saccharine. When bad stuff happens, they accept it. But they choose to focus elsewhere.

In their mind, the world is full of amazing people doing great things. Isn't it humbling, even demoralising to live this way?

It turns out it's empowering. Focus on empowerment and that's what you get.

This choice you make with your conscious mind trains your unconscious. What you focus on teaches your mind what you want. If you pay attention to your successes in romance, then you'll follow opportunities to get more.

If you fixate on your failures, then it's time to rethink your mental strategy.

A practical strategy is to choose three times per day - morning, lunch and just before bed. Review your day and notice what worked. Pay attention to what you did right. If you made mistakes, then focus on what you can learn or what you did right within the mistake.

Do this until it becomes a habit.

Then follow the habit until it becomes your way of seeing the world.

This is the simplest mind training that you can do. Appreciate that its simplicity is a feature and do it.

It will lay the foundations for more advanced exercises.

Like those that Awakened Thought subscribers receive each month.

Take action to focus on your successes now:

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