Define Success On Your Own Terms 

 Do you know that the more successful you feel now, the more success you will experience later? 

What is something you always wanted to do but never took the time to do? For example, surfing, attending cooking classes, taking a photography class. Think of something fun and childlike and not something work related. 

I suspect that you have spent many years pursuing knowledge and education while focusing on your career. There are parts of yourself that you have neglected and are now crying out for attention. That is why I ask you what is something you always wanted to do but never did. Those parts of you are crying out to be heard. 

You have such a depth of wealth, inside wealth, that you can tap into and create a wonderful life from. That wealth is part of the fullness of who you are. Living from the fullness of who you are is critical to your success. Success is not a partial or compartmental phenomenon but we all treat it like that. 

Everyone wants to be successful. Success is encoded in our DNA. One of the critical human needs, is the need for significance in our uniqueness and individuality. This need for significance drives us to pursue success. However, something gets mistranslated in this pursuit of success. The point is that success is already ours. It is not something elusive that we want to chase after. Instead, it is something that is already ours as it is encoded in each of the cells in our body. 

Therefore, our objective is to practice success, not pursue it. 

Let us redefine success. If you look up "success" in the dictionary, you will find a definition that says: the attainment of wealth, position, honors or the like. What is missing in this definition?

"Happiness!"

Ingrained in our psyche is a definition of success that includes wealth and honors but not "happiness." Maybe this is why you have felt unfulfilled in your "successful" job. Our entire educational system and socialization is about achieving success and wealth and position and honors. Now, your happiness is asking for some space in your life. 

Did you know that happy people make about a million dollars more in their lifetime than unhappy people? Marci Schimoff in her book, "Happy for No Reason" teaches us that happiness is a habit that is worthwhile creating. Some people are naturally happy and some are not. You can cultivate habits that will help you create more happiness in your life. As you focus on creating more happiness in your life you will find that you are also making more money.  

Think of it this way, unconsciously have been waiting for your knight in shining armor to ride in on a white horse and "he" never came. You thought your job, your partner, your car, your accomplishments were your "knight." 

Well, I have breaking news for you. "He" is not coming but you do still get the white horse! Except, you are riding into your life on your white horse and you have been riding it for a long time unaware. You are your own heroine!

For men, you thought you would experience grand satisfaction when you were able to provide for your family. And you did. But that feeling of satisfaction fizzed out and remains elusive. Now what? Your manhood is not tied into how much money you make. I promise you. This is a myth that men share. You are far more precious to your family and kids than how much money you make. You are far more precious to yourself than how much money you make. 

So take the time to redefine success for yourself. Include in your definition of success play and laughter. Include happiness in it. Include feeling content and satisfied now in it. This is how you attract and create abundance. And finally, enjoy success now! Not later.

by Iyabo Asani


This article is part of a 40 page report by Iyabo Asani on "How to Reinvent Yourself at Midlife and Maintain Your Sanity." If you would like a complimentary copy of the full report, please visit:  a< href="http://www.CoachIyabo.com/reinvent">HERE.

Iyabo Asani is a life and business coach. A former lawyer, she left the practice of law after twenty years and now, she helps empower smart boomers create businesses and attract abundance by discovering the gifts and talents of their Inner Genius.

Article Source: http://www.articlesphere.com/Article/Define-Success-On-Your-Own-Terms/189379

Consciously Choose Your Social System 

 We human beings are social beings. Oftentimes, we forget that we are social beings. It is important to remember this, not just when there is a loss of some sort in our lives but all the time. When you are too busy pursuing your career and financial goals, you loose your ability to connect with other human beings. How are your social connections? If you work for a large company, are you aware that company is a social system? Your community is a social system and if you have a large enough family, that is a social system. 

Are you aware of the social system that you belong to? Are you giving to it? Are you taking from it? Being deliberate about your social system is critical to your life reinvention process. There are some old relationships that you want to rekindle. There are some you want to let go of. Let them go. Rekindle those that matter. 

Whenever we engage with our social system our brains continuously scan for information that assess whether the person we are engaging in is a threat or a reward. If we perceive an interaction as a threat, we recoil and if perceive it as a reward, we engage more fully. 

Some of us, having focused on work and career for so many years may have neglected to develop strong social skills and we end up unconsciously reacting to interactions with other people as threats.

Be more deliberate in your interactions and look for those reward experiences and enjoy them. The reward experiences create the release of hormones and chemicals in our bodies that enhance our health and well-being. The reward experiences are powerful and we want to follow the trial that they leave behind. 

Within these social relationships, do not forget your intimate relationships. If you are intimately involved with someone, get physical in an affectionate way and make it part of your weekly and daily routine to incorporate touch and affection into your life. If you have a partner, reinvent your sex life! It is important. 

Did you know that if a baby is not held and touched by other humans, the baby dies? What do you think happens with that when we grow up? We still need touch, physical and emotional connection.  It is part of our neural wiring. 

So expand your social networks. Take risks. Enjoy new connections. Experience the rewards of positive relationships. Look for those relationships across multiple dimensions. Enjoy lots of hugs and smiles. Give them and take them. 

Relate with people from all age groups. Kids. The Elderly. People with Down's Syndrome. Kids with autism. Disadvantaged kids. Intellectuals. College students. Blue Collar workers. White collar workers. People outside your own race. People outside your sexual orientation. 

When you stretch your social network like this, you are developing new neural patterns that reduce your brain's perception of threats and overall releases hormones of reward which include oxytocin. 

Sure, it may feel too risky to develop these relationships. However, the rewards are great. There is an element of courage that you want to develop so that you find yourself thriving in any situation. Remember, you are a whole person, wonderful, full of wealth and gifts and when you engage with someone else, you get to share that component of yourself. 

As you focus on your social system, you will discover that you have a renewed sense of appreciation and gratitude for the loved ones in your life. They are part of your wealth. Having a wealth of love is important to your ability to have an abundance mindset. So as you go about reinventing your life and creating an abundance mindset, enjoy the rich rewards of a wonderful, safe and supportive social system.
by Iyabo Asani



This article is part of a 40 page report by Iyabo Asani on "How to Reinvent Yourself at Midlife and Maintain Your Sanity." If you would like a complimentary copy of the full report, please visit:  a< href="http://www.CoachIyabo.com/reinvent">HERE.

Iyabo Asani is a life and business coach. A former lawyer, she left the practice of law after twenty years and now, she helps empower smart boomers create businesses and attract abundance by discovering the gifts and talents of their Inner Genius.

Article Source:http://www.articlesphere.com/Article/Consciously-Choose-Your-Social-System/189381